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Secret Mission Interrupted

Secret Mission Interrupted

We live in a world where ‘finding yourself’ can be dismissed as a self-indulgent luxury. But I believe it is vital. We’ve all been sent on the same secret mission: to discover who we are, to own our gifts, and to share them in service to others. It is the reason we are here.

But what if we don’t like what we find out about ourselves? What if essential parts of us are not acceptable to the people and institutions around us? The brave will persist until we find community, acceptance, and love. We will trust and love ourselves. The courageous will insist the world make space for us. We will be seen; we will be heard. The intrepid will fight to create change from the inside out. We will make waves.


But some of us succumb to conformity and lack the courage to be true to self. We hide, or we overcompensate and try to be something we are not. Without community that reflects our true selves, we cannot flourish. If we cannot see a way forward, we can become despairing and self-destructive. We can turn our self-hatred on others. This too often becomes catastrophic in a society that lacks sane gun control policies.

In Sunday’s mass murder in Orlando, 49 LGBTQ+ people had their secret missions cut short by someone who could not find his way to know and accept his own truth. The shooter is someone who may have been gay, surrounded by fundamentalist Islamic prejudice that says being gay is unacceptable. The full story is complex and multi-layered and to be revealed. All we know is that someone who is happy with himself, someone who has a way forward in life, does not commit mass murder.


I grieve for the beautiful young people who were killed for celebrating life, for just being themselves in community. May all the love and promise they embodied take root in us and grow more powerful. I stand with these eternal souls, their friends and families, to use the overwhelming depth and strength of our love (and our grief) to make much needed changes in our society.

This may be controversial, but I also grieve for the shooter. He made horrible, hopeless, devastating choices and could not find a peaceful way to be in this world. I wonder what gifts, in other circumstances, he could have brought to the world if he had been braver to know himself beyond ideology.


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Healing Quotes

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty YES to your adventure.”

– Joseph Campbell

“Human beings are not born once and for all on the day their mothers give birth to them…life obliges them over and over again to give birth to themselves.”

– Gabriel Garcia Marquez

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

– E. M. Forster

“Our only security is our ability to change.”

– John Lilly

“In order to be a good warrior, one has to feel this sad and tender heart.”

– Chogyam Trungpa

“Your absence has gone through me like thread through a needle. Everything I do is stitched with its color.”

– W. S. Merwin

“Joy moves always to new locations,
the ease of its flow never freezing.
A long winter’s tale is over. Now
with each spring day, a new story.”

– Rumi

“Now is the moment, Here is the place of Liberation.”

– Alex Grey

“Grief is not a task to finish,
And move on,
But an element of yourself –
An alteration of your being.
A new way of seeing,
A new definition of self.”

– Barb Mather

“We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution.”

– Bill Hicks

“There is deep wisdom within our very flesh, if we can only come to our senses and feel it.”

– Elizabeth A. Behnke

“Don’t run away from grief, o soul
Look for the remedy inside the pain.
Because the rose came from the thorn
And the ruby came from a stone.”

– Rumi

“The next message you need is always right where you are.”

– Ram Dass

“Everything in life that we really accept undergoes a change. So suffering must become love. That is the mystery.”

– Katherine Mansfield

“It’s time again. Tear up the violets and plant something more difficult to grow.”

– James Schuyler

“The absolute tranquility is the present moment. Though it is at this moment, there is no limit to this moment, and therein is eternal delight.”

– Hui-Neng